Family secrets: I hoped bulimia would make me beautiful Posted on July 1st
At the age of 12 I was anorexic, weighing just over 6st (38kg)at 5ft 2in
(1.57m). A few months before, I’d had puppy-fat, but a girl in my class had
called me ugly. I wanted people to think I was beautiful, so I’d decided to
starve myself. One day I saw a TV programme about a girl who threw up to
stay slim. Starving, I went to the kitchen, got several scones, smothered
them with jam and after eating them went to the bathroom and stuck my
fingers down my throat. I felt tense, conscious I was doing something
forbidden, yet also blasé and numb - typical bulimic emotions to which I
later became habituated. I emerged on a clean, guiltless breeze, my parents
downstairs suspecting nothing.